Reflection

Endings. And doing what you thought you could not do.

“Storytelling…from the first sentence to the last, is leading to a singular goal, and ideally confirming some truth that deepens our understandings of who we are as human beings. We all love stories. We’re born for them. Stories affirm who we are. We all want affirmations that our lives have meaning. And nothing does a greater affirmation than when we connect through stories. It can cross the barriers of time, past, present and future, and allow us to experience the similarities between ourselves and through others, real and imagined.”
Andrew Stanton

Dear Writers,

On Sunday, it was 55 in Chicago, and my family and I got out the bikes and road the lakefront. We pedaled about 30 miles—a good first outing for the season. We never talk much when we are pedaling. Riding for us is a moving meditation. Perfect timing too. It got me ready to revise my ending of what I’ve called my REACH novel.

This novel, a story in multiple POVs, has challenged and delighted me like nothing I’ve ever written. First, I wasn’t sure I could write it at all. I didn’t feel worthy. Or strong enough. I like feeling that way. Out of my league. Challenged to use up my reserve. Unafraid of failure, because failure is likely.

I pedaled.

It had been a tough week. I don’t want to get into specifics, but let’s just say: we really need to be nicer to each other. We need to give each other the benefit of the doubt, and when we hear gossip, we should stop. And connect. And be good to each other. Because just like those emails I keep getting that promise me the world, most of this stuff we read out there is not accurate.

Friends, it is terrible to feel mis-seen. Mis-labeled. Attacked for something you are not.

Not surprising, so many of our stories are about this. About wanting the world to see us. And appreciate us for who we are. When I get mad, it’s usually because I feel unseen. Or mis-seen. This week, I spent a good part of this week feeling scared. And not safe. I considered cancelling out of things I was looking forward to.

(I didn’t. I’m still that kid who doesn’t give up.)

This is why community has always been my foundation. By the time I got on that bike, I felt reassured. Not alone. (Thank you, Friend. You know who you are.) Also: as I got ready to revise, I realized that this experience, this moment of fear and vulnerability, was going to help me solidify my ending, because this conflict reminded me who I am. And what I want. And what I value. This ending—this novel—is about all that. It is a reflection that needs to be about more than solving a mystery (although yay! I did it! I crafted a villain!) In this story, I am striving to create characters that prioritize what I do: Family. Love. Friendship. Lots of humor and heart. Honesty. Facing our flaws at this time in our lives.

Stories allow us to experience the similarities between ourselves and through others, real and imagined. That is why we read the whole world.

I often say that great endings are conversation starters. They are also reflections. Meditations. They are surprising and inevitable. Also: they offer hope. Imagination. Wonder. Endings fulfill a promise to the reader. They also fulfill a promise to ourselves. They reveal who we are and what we value. They are our last chance to say something personal to the reader. Great endings don’t come out of nowhere. They come from our core. And our story’s core. And who we are. And what we continue to reach for. Even when we can’t get there yet.

Let’s all try and connect more. Let’s not let this online world push us away from having meaningful conversations.

Sometimes, it is painful to reflect. (None of us are perfect.) But in reflection, comes growth. And change. The very nature of story.

Are you ready to reach???

This week, I posted an essay on finding your why. Enjoy! I wrote it about nonfiction, but it’s true for everything we write.

Today, try and connect your beginning to your ending to your WHY. Write yourself a letter: why did you start this story? Why did it matter to you? What did you want to say? Did you say it? If not, why not?

Have a great writing week!

xo Sarah